Anxiety? Kindness…

I recall words from my therapist that continue to ring true, shifting the paradigm for me.

When I told her that I was having a difficult time recalling people’s names after being introduced at parties or large functions, she gave me the reason and brought all the receipts!

After some time chatting about it, we discovered that these events triggered intense anxiety. for me My therapist explained that my body was going into fight/flight/freeze mode.

When the body perceives there is imminent danger, all of the energy rushes to protect the internal organs to preserve life. (Apparently my brain is not as high a priority.)

Because the anxiety of being overwhelmed when meeting new people and wondering what they thought of me, thinking they were judging me, or simply feeling inadequate, the anxiety caused my brain to go into autopilot (general nondescript small talk) and my mind wasn’t retaining anything.

My therapist said that 1 in 3 people have this same anxiety. And, she suggested, that those I’m introduced to at these functions are most likely in the same flight/fight/freeze mode; they aren’t processing my name either… and for the same reasons.

Understanding that others are suffering in the same way has made a huge difference when I walk into a party, attend an event, etc. I remind myself that 1 out of every 3 people I meet is also struggling with the same anxiety. Empathy kicks in and I’m able to be more attentive, more open to speaking with others, and more focused on helping them to be at ease. Speaking kind words, affirm their achievements, being attentive in their presence. I might ask them questions about those things that are easy to speak of, things we may have in common, and treat them as if they were the only person in the room… even if just for a moment. This approach has made all the difference.

Focus off me and on to others. Kindness kills a lot of anxiety!

Please pray for those 1 in 3, and know of my prayers for you.