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- The Cross
Today is Good Friday. At 2pm, I will drive to our local Cathedral and participate in the Celebration of Our Lord’s Passion. To those unfamiliar with the Good Friday service (it is not a Mass), the day will include a reading of the Passion account from John’s Gospel, Veneration of the Cross, and then Holy Communion (consecrated last night). It’s the Veneration of the Cross that I’m reflecting upon. A cross, veiled in purple since the beginning of Passiontide, will be brought before the altar. A deacon will present the cross to the bishop who will ceremoniously uncover the top part of the cross, and then the right arm, and finally remove the cloth. If circumstances allow, the bishop will remove his chasuble and shoes then venerate and adore the cross. It will be a great sign of humility and harkens back to the time of Moses when he removed his sandals before the great I Am in the form of the Burning Bush. After the other clergy venerate the cross, it will be time for the laity to approach. Our solemn procession brings us to confront the most horrific instrument of death used by Roman executioners reserved only for the vilest of criminals. The sweetest form of veneration will come in the form of a kiss. Others will simply touch the cross or bow before it. To those outside Christendom, including most Protestants, this display may seem utterly confounding. Why would anyone want to celebrate an instrument of torture? We don’t. We venerate the Cross in humble thanksgiving and adoration for the gift of salvation offered by Jesus. We do not adore the actual wood but what it represents… for Christ’s sacrifice cannot be separated from the Cross. With this reality before me, I know that my heart will be moved and, if the past is any indication, tears will follow. So, what happens at 3:00pm? What happens tomorrow? Or a week or a month from today? Will I still be willing to continue this veneration the Cross by carrying my own? This is my desire and hope. But, for today, I will focus on the Cross of Christ: We adore Thee, O Christ, and we bless Thee because by Thy Holy Cross Thou has Redeemed the World. Please pray for me as I pray for you. - God Slapped
I often have difficulty meditating on the Passion. I don’t know if it’s a psychological thing where I can’t bear to reflect on the pain and torture that Jesus endured, or a pride thing where I believe I’d never be one in the crowd to yell, “Crucify Him!”. It’s difficult for me to connect with; almost a story that I’m not engaged in. I want to enter Holy Week and offer authentic worship as my Jesus is bruised, broken, and crucified for me. God knows my heart and my desire to do so; I just need His help. This morning, the Holy Spirit provided a simple fact that will change everything for me. If you’re like me, maybe the quote below from St. John Henry Newman will help you enter more deeply into this Holy Week. I believe my Good Friday will be different this year. Think of this and consider whether with this thought you can read the last chapters of the four Gospels without fear and trembling. For instance, “When He had said this, one of the officers standing by struck Jesus with his hand, saying ‘Is that how you answer the high priest?’” (John 18:22). The words must be said: That officer lifted up his hand against God the Son. This is not a figurative way of speaking, a rhetorical form of words, or a harsh, extreme, and unadvisable statement. It is a literal and simple truth. It is a great Catholic doctrine. St. John Henry Newman After reading Newman’s quote from, “The Tears of Christ – Meditations on Lent”, I had two thoughts: First: Someone actually slapped God… the One who created them, the One who loved them, the One who allowed Himself to be slapped by this person… and many others who would also strip, scourge, mock, whip, spit at, crown with thorns, and crucify. Second: God didn’t raise His hand in self-defense or attack. I know this second point might seem obvious since we all know that this was the purpose for which Jesus came – in order that we might be saved. But the more I reflect upon His quiet humility and self-control, the more I realize how little I often show restraint. About 20 years ago I took karate lessons with the hubby and our youngest daughter. One day, we were learning how to spar. I hated this part because I bruise easily and don’t like to get hurt (call it self preservation; also, I’m a wuss). It was my turn on the matt and my opponent was one of the kids – I’ll call him Ike – was in my CCD class. Our families were good friends; he was an awesome kid. He was also a red belt (one below black) and I was a yellow belt (one above white). We were from two ends of the spectrum. But, this was a learning experience; you never know who you might have to defend yourself against. Ike and I entered the center and bowed. Before I knew what hit me, he did. Ike did a roundhouse kick to my chesticles. He totally caught me off guard… actually, he took both of us off guard as he meant to kick my arm or someplace less ‘personal’. We both took a step back to assess. I don’t know what got into me; I simply looked up and said, “you’re mine”. Then, gave him a ‘mom’ look as I pulled my arm back to throw a punch. I may have been lunging toward him. Everything was a blur. He ran off the matt. It was the first time I ever won a match. So… there’s that. [Disclaimer: No child or youth was hit. He retreated too fast. Don’t @ me with CPS.] Reflecting on the match – once I was hit the adrenaline took over. It happened so quickly. It was an uncontrolled, thoughtless reaction; certainly not the tactic of an experienced martial artist. It certainly wasn’t what Jesus did. At 50+ I would probably act differently. Actually, I’d never get on the matt in the first place. And honestly, none of us can ever say how we would react if we were in Jesus’ sandals. We’re not the Savior; crucifixion won’t be in our cards. The closest we can hope for is martyrdom or a simple holy death. In the meantime, we can have a deeper understanding of the humility of Jesus in the face of human weakness and the ugliness of a fallen society. Moving forward, training will no longer involve sparring and matches, replaced by prayerful requests for an exponential increase in self control along with the practice of humility. Let’s make a firm resolve to end this God slapping, lest we be the ones running off the matt into spiritual death. Please pray for me this Holy Week as I pray for you! - God Messed Up My Lent
Is the title a little clickbaity? Maybe, but you’re here… and, it was kind of the truth at the time. Well, you’ll see… I had a pretty good plan for my 2024 Lent: In my humble opinion, it was a good plan. Everything had a purpose, some more obvious than others; all personal but would also benefit the body of Christ in some fashion. As things often do, Lent started off well. But after Mass on the first Sunday of Lent, I came home and realized I hadn’t yet pulled any items from my closet to donate. Mostly because I didn’t have a plan for where to put them. And then, because I didn’t see a bin or box, the intention was ‘out of sight, out of mind’. Strait off, I found an empty box and started plucking items from my wardrobe: I was starting to run out of ‘easy’ items in my closet (easy meaning ‘I no longer wanted them’). No problem, I had plenty of clothes downstairs in a plastic tub containing my spring/summer wardrobe. On the way to the basement I was drawn to a ‘junk’ drawer at the bottom of a side table next to my bed. It’s a drawer filled with old computer cables, camera parts, cell phone cases, chargers, etc. The only time I ever open this drawer is to toss in an unused item. Certainly it wasn’t a drawer that would provide fodder for this part of my Lenten plan. Then, buried at the bottom, a hint of bright blue caught my eye. Pulling out cables and other paraphernalia revealed a certificate I received in 2015. It was presented to me upon the completion of a week-long intensive course for new diocesan directors by the National Federation for Catholic Youth Ministry (aka NFCYM which runs NCYC and the NCCYM), and is sponsored by the USCCB (we Catholics do love acronyms). As I type this, the certificate is 9 years old. I retired from youth & young adult ministry several years ago. Why was I led to open that particular drawer? Why did this item catch my eye? Why was I so moved to hold it, gaze upon it? Why didn’t I just through the damn thing out. This is where God messed me up… or so I thought. I caught myself pondering the myriad of questions that pelted my heart. Something caused me to pause and consider the blue cardstock in my hand. As a spiritual director, what would I tell my directees? “Take it to God in prayer, then invite Him to sit in the memories that come to mind.” So I did. When I was hired by the Erie Diocese I was so humbled that someone would even consider me… a homeschool wife and mother with two young girls who lived the homesteading lifestyle with goats, pigs, and a husband who hunted & trapped. On the other hand, I was a cradle Catholic faithful to the Church, on fire for Jesus, with years of experience leading youth ministry. So, why the self-doubt? This candidate lacked a college degree. For purposes of keeping this longer blog from becoming longer, I’ll spare the details for another time. Just know this was an issue that caused great self-doubt and a feeling of unworthiness for many, many years. That said … In the late 80s there was no such thing as a Bachelor’s in Youth Ministry. In fact, the term ‘youth ministry’ was just coming into vogue. The only training available was ‘on the job’ in a parish blessed enough with a pastor who saw value in this unique ministry. Being a youth minister wasn’t a career; it was a “volunteer opportunity”. My opportunity in youth ministry began through a selfish desire – I wanted our daughters to encounter Jesus more often than one day a week at Mass, but our little country church offered nothing more than CCD (which was boring and kumbaya’ish). So, when our DRE (Director of Religious Education; aka CCD leader) quit, the pastor hired me. Youth ministry became an organic addition to my other duties. TBH, I went down a rabbit hole with the Lord as I was writing this post; it’s one I’ve been down before and is difficult to get out of. Healing non-the-less, this just isn’t the place to share. …and the post was getting really long. If you’ve made it this far… congratulations and thank you. Please continue. The only thing I brought to the table was a love for Christ and a heart to serve young people. I held no piece of gilded, embossed, creamy cardstock stamped with a university logo. No letters appear after my name. I’m sure, at least I hope, you will understand why going to the NFCYM in Washington, DC, for that intensive week-long course was so pivotal in my youth ministry opportunity-turned-career. At the end of the week I finally stood shoulder to shoulder with wonderful Catholics, each with multiple letters behind their name and I’m sure several framed diplomas displayed on their office walls. This was a certificate I took so much pride in. This certificate validated my 15 years of hard work in youth & young adult ministry – at the parish & diocesan level. This certificate rationalized my many, many hours away from my husband and children. This certificate gave me access to the ‘big kids table’. This certificate became my identity. This certificate had to go. Through this process of prayer my heart told me something was off and Jesus verified it. My identity did not lie in the blue piece of cardboard with my name on it. My identity was not developed on a plane to DC. My identity did not exist because of the USCCB. The truth of my identity is found in Sacred Scripture: Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I dedicated you. Jeremiah 1:5 God loved me into existence. His word is more valuable […] - Discernment of Spirits 8-Week Course!
NOTE: Registration closes on March 29 or until full. Don’t wait – register down below 👇 Beginning on the Friday of Easter Week, on April 5, we will embark on an eight week journey to understand and practice THE most important topic of consideration in prayer and the interior life: “Discernment of Spirits“. During these eight weeks, we will discover exactly what the phrase “Discernment of Spirits” means (hint: it has nothing to do with demonology), how the rules were developed, how they apply, when to apply them, and where Satan fits into this whole subject, because… Spirits. This course is a cooperative between Kathleen Peterson and Allie Yaw, both seasoned spiritual directors. Kathleen has a background in youth & family ministry, and Allie has a degree in counseling; both are continuing their education in healing ministry. (click their names for more information). This will be the third time they have come together for such an important, life changing, in-depth workshop and they hope you will be part of it! BUT… 2 THINGS: Please mark your calendar for the following dates (10:00am to 11:30am Eastern Standard Time): April 5April 12April 19April 26May 3May 10May 17May 24 No books are required for purchase and all materials will be provided to you prior to each session. The cost for this 8 week course is $60.00. The fee helps defray the cost of the technology and materials which is shared by Allie and Kathleen. Payment should be remitted $30.00 to Allie and $30.00 to Kathleen. (We wish there was an easier way, taxes & otherwise, to make this more efficient for you. Your patience is kindly received.) Allie’s Information: Kathleen’s Information: NOTE: No one will be turned away due to financial stress. The day before each class you will receive an email with the Zoom link and password. If you are involved in other offerings from Allie or Kathleen, please note that this will be a unique link and password. If you have a friend who may be interested in this course, please share this page or send them the flier and have them register ASAP. We are keeping this class small (TEN registrants) so that everyone will have time for discussion. More information will be forthcoming as we get closer to our start date. Would you like to share this info with a friend? Click to print 👉 FLIER 👈 ARE YOU READY TO REGISTER? FILL OUT THE FORM BELOW! - Pregaming Lent
You may think this is a sacrilegious post… pounding a few bottles of Merlot before Ash Wednesday. ’tis not the case (pun intended). No, I’m taking this newly discovered season of Septuagesima seriously and putting it into practice as the Church intended many years ago. Just as a couch potato shouldn’t expect to finish a marathon without a significant training plan, neither will we truly be spiritually successful in our Lenten resolutions if we don’t prepare. Septuagesima Sunday marks 70 days before Easter (‘ish – we won’t tackle the calculation of days in this post). Next week, we celebrate Sexagesima (60 days); the following week is Quinquagesima (50 days). Midway though that week we begin our 40 days of penitance on Ash Wednesday. This is probably the most cursory overview of this season you’ll come across as I’m just a simple Jane-in-the-pew learning as I go. I can tell you from experience that giving up wine, chocolate, or (dare I say) social media cold turkey can lead to a feeling of failure and possibly throwing in the towel for good. God wants to see us succeed. Holy Mother Church wants us to help. I have no idea why this practice went out of vogue. But it’s a shame. Our traditions are not just things that were done for the hell of it. But out of a true desire for our growth in holiness. To master our wills. To control our impulses. To make sacrifices which sting a little so that we might have something penitential to offer Jesus throughout these 40 days. So, my pregame is to give up alcohol starting today. If I slip here or there these next 3 weeks, it’s okay. I’m just prepping for the real race. Next week I will be adding an extra day of Mass during the week. Then, in Quinquagesima I will replace all video (including YouTube, IG Reels, and TikTok). I have several books to finish which will replace the screen time. And, it will help me to be more present to those I love. There are so many beautiful aspects of this season; I hope you will find inspiration to pregame your own Lent in 2024. Please pray for me as I start my plan and know of my prayers for you! PS: if you want a really good, detailed and historically correct explanation of this season, I highly recommend this video from Sensus Fidelium, “Septuagesima Sunday: Warming up For Lent and St. Gregory the Great’s Advice for Fasting” (I don’t know who the priest is. If you know, please put his name in the comments below.) [img source: Piotr Arnoldes on Pixels] - Are We Being Served Inferior Wine?
A few weeks ago, I was praying with the Scripture, John 2:1-10, the Wedding Feast at Cana. A line stood out; it struck me as if I had never read it before. Taking this as an inspiration from the Holy Spirit, I sat with the verse for quite a while. To have a better understanding of why this hit so hard, I need to back up and give some context. During Advent 2023, I gave up listening to my regular podcasters and YouTubers. Most of them offer Catholic commentary, but I balance that out with travel channels or court reporting (I’m totally fascinated). This self-imposed sanction didn’t last beyond Christmas day. The internet began, once again, to suck my soul. Lately, and I mean really, for the past year or two, Catholic content creators have been reporting on the goings-on in Rome with a critical eye (not unwarranted). Each morning, after coffee & prayer, I’d pick up my cellphone and go down the rabbit hole of ecclesial gossip. After a morning of listening to different shows, I found myself dipping into desolation. Why? We’ve gone from bad to worse (some may say heresy and sacrilege) in a very short and subtle period of time. My beloved Catholic Church appears to be, almost systematically, torn apart at the seams. I’m sure there will be some, probably many, who might think otherwise. The ones cheering on Pope Francis and his leadership bringing the Church into the modern world. What was once black & white doctrine is now ambiguous and lukewarm decree and opinion. Sadly, many people seem to be quite content. This reminds me of how one can place a frog in a pot of water and very slowly bring it to boil. The frog is absolutely unaware of his most precarious situation. Within minutes, he becomes someone’s appetizer. I think there are some people in the hierarchy who turned on the stove a long time ago, hoping the faithful wouldn’t notice. It’s only by sure grace and the vigilant posture of many that we’ve jumped out of the pot and are now trying to figure out who turned on the stove in the first place… and how to turn it off. Sadly, many will refuse to leave the pot only to suffer the fate of the frog. This brings me back to the line in Sacred Scripture that I prayed with: The headwaiter said to the bridegroom, “Everyone serves good wine first, and then when people have drunk freely, an inferior one; but you have kept the good wine until now.” John 2:10 This line is in reference to Mary’s observation that they had run out of wine with several days of the wedding feast still to come. Mary tells Jesus, who then tells the servers to take large jars and fill them with water. He miraculously turns the water into wine and instructs the servers to take a sample to the wine steward (head waiter). It is then that we are privy to the statement about the good wine being served before the guests are too drunk to know the difference – when they swap it for cheap, inferior wine. I think we can apply this same concept to what may be going on in the Church today. Have we become so lax, so apathetic, so blind that we are drunk and now being served inferior teaching? Just as Christ brings only the best wine, so too should the Church, the bride of Christ, bring us, the guests at the wedding feast, only the best teaching. Not something inferior, ambiguous, vague, and possibly heretical because they think us drunk and naïve. Such a thought brings a sadness to my heart… that a progressive movement and those pushing an agenda might possibly prey upon the morally weak, the ill-informed, and those mired in sin, by the very people meant to bring healing and keep them spiritually safe. (Of course this doesn’t apply to all clerics in leadership positions.) For if Jesus Christ brings only the best wine, we should expect His Vicar on earth to bring the best doctrine, the clearest teaching, the sweetest truth. But no, the hierarchy appears to have run out. Instead of going to Jesus, they pridefully serve what is inferior, hoping we won’t notice because we’re intoxicated by worldly, watered-down offerings. Obviously, this is just one Jane-in-the-pew’s opinion. But… For those of you who aren’t quite buzzed yet, watch your drink so it doesn’t get spiked. Between the time that I prayed with this scripture verse and actually wrote this post, the Holy Spirit placed another inspiration on my heart: to pray a daily “Memorare” with the specific intention of covering the next holy pope with the Blood of Christ, preserving him from all evil, filling him with an abundance of truth and courage, and keeping him wrapped in Mary’s mantle for protection and care. You are welcome to join me in this daily prayer. Pray for me as I pray for you!
